After a recent session with my trainer, I got to thinking about all the random and strange thoughts that go through my head. It came up because she said she had on her to-do list to read one of my other blog posts. And a lot of the strange thoughts that I have occur in the gym because I do a great deal of people watching there and when you are on the treadmill, sometimes your mind just wanders.
Granted, many of the thoughts are just way out there and could possibly explain a whole lot about me, but here goes. Some of the strange thoughts I have:
- Oh, you’re wearing plaid underwear! I wonder if you have stuff with an argyle pattern and if you’re a big fan of plaid.
- There is an ENTIRE ROW of treadmills to use. WHY must you get on the one right next to me?
- I know you’re here to sweat, but it would be really nice if you took a shower before coming to the gym. Workout sweat on top of funk is a bad combination for my nose
- Got your message loud and clear. No need to pretend.
- People who jack the incline up on the treadmill and then lean back to walk are really not getting the benefit of “walking that hill.” You’re just looking dopey
- People who take their devil spawn to the bar just need to be hurt. A bar, those places where adult beverages are served, are not there to cater to you and the devil spawn. If you want to hang at the bar and drink, you have two options (well, really only one): get a baby sitter to watch your devil spawn so you can go elsewhere to drink or 2) STAY HOME AND DRINK.
- The thought of cleaning is really annoying
- If only I could get close enough to get a whiff of your scent. Then if you smell bad, I can stop thinking you’re hot.
- I need to stop being around so many bitchy people at work
- I do not understand why something that has been explained numerous times in numerous ways still is baffling to some people. Are they just that stupid and don’t pay attention?
- Prisoners of War is actually way more intriguing than Homeland is
- This season of True Blood is looking to be bad
- Sometimes (ok a lot of times) movies force romance in places where it is just completely unnecessary
- “I’m busy” has become today’s polite way to tell people you don’t want to see / talk to them
- Leggings are NOT pants. No matter how hard you try to make them that way, they are JUST. NOT. PANTS.
- Telling me your “qualifications” as a sports fan (i.e., how long you’ve watched a team, etc) is not going to make your point ring any truer for me. Especially if you are making a dumb point. In fact, I will just think gee you’ve been stupid about whatever your point is for a really long time
- Hockey is a great sport. Too bad some fans are not embracing of new people who want to learn it.
- Flip flops should not be worn as regular shoes. They make an annoying sound when you walk and most people need a pedicure before wearing them anyway.
- When the temperatures start to warm up, it really is OKAY to slap on some anti-perspirant / deodorant. In fact, most people in society will thank you for putting it on.
- And speaking of thanking you for wearing deodorant, it is also a good thing to wash every now and again. Because in polite society, people do that sort of thing on the regular.
- Boys should not wear skinny jeans. Actually women probably shouldn’t either.
- I wish more people truly understood what racism is.
- Sometimes, I think I must be the most despicable person on the planet.
- People who stomp when they run on the treadmill must be in pain. Running shouldn’t hurt or sound that noisy
- It really sucks being a nice person all the time.
- I am probably the absolute worst friend to people ever
- If this show worked in real life would you want to go back and do things over?
And there you have some of the random stuff that goes through my head. Some of it makes perfect sense and others of it, is just out there. I’m sure others have some similar thoughts, but I just felt like expressing them today.